Friday, January 11, 2013

9 years ago today-CHEERS!

Nine years ago today my life changed. At that time I thought it was a death sentence, but I now know it was for a greater purpose. Jan. 5th I went to the hospital with severe abdominal pain. I knew exactly, before any doctor could tell me, what it was. I sat in the hospital for days and finally I had the 5 pound mass removed from my body. Wow! Five pounds, I knew for sure I was in trouble! Jan. 7th, I had the surgery, by the looks of it all was good, just a fibroid tumor nothing to worry about. But on Jan. 9th I was told the most horrific news, I had cancer. I had a rare cancer. I had a cancer the would kill me in 5 years. I sat listening to the news. I looked at my brand new husband, my sister in law and my Mom in hopes for some reassurance, but none came. I was told I would have to have a hysterectomy. A what? What is that, I thought. Never mind what it was I wanted it and I wanted the cancer out of me. Scared, very scared as it sunk into my mind, I had cancer. What was I going to do? What about my family? My friends? I couldn't think of leaving them. As days, weeks and months went by I finished treatment. What a relief, but an emptiness. Now what do I do? Will it come back and when? Will I be a Mom? Wait a second... will I? I didn't know what to think of this. I always thought I would be, but how now? What would I do? Give up? Years went by and after a lot, I mean a lot of tear, I would soon face the fact I would never carry a child. I had no ovaries and no uterus, it was out of the question. Soon we began the adoption process and it was not easy. More and more days went by with more and more tears. This stupid disease caused me to let go of the hope of being a Mom. Flash forward years to 2008, June 13th, a daughter would be ours. She was born on Jan. 15,2007 and she was going to be ours. In a few days we will celebrate her 6th birthday. My dream of being a Mom has came true . I now know why this happened to me. I do not feel sorry for myself and for what happened 9 years ago, I celebrate it! If it wasn't for January 11, 2004 I wouldn't have my best friend. I wouldn't have Sophie. God gives us things to overcome and at that time we see it as punishment, but if we wait we see that the greatest outcome will come from our sadness. So today, I thank you God for what happened all those years ago. I thank you for giving Sophie to me. I couldn't imagine life without her. I often wonder if this cancer will come back, but with the faith and support of my friends and family I am able to fight off those fears. So today I toast a cheers to my daughter, Sophie you are my hero. Thank you Lord for my life! PS : CANCER SUCKS

1 comment:

degagédheart said...

You are an amazing person for having such a glowing outlook on life! Keep blogging and I wish you the best life with the best little girl!